YAC Community Blogs- Everyone has a story.

Gradually, falling asleep again became difficult. I'm constantly tired still. Whether it's my allergies, my depression, or a combination of it all. It's exhausting. Not knowing what the next step is - for me - exhausting. Everyone I talked to, every group I went to, even Michael told me I should go talk to a professional.

So at 20, I made myself aware. Made myself look around to discover - if everything around me is so great, why am I so miserable? There has to be a missing piece to the puzzle here, someone has got to have an answer

1. Name / Where Are You From?
Jillian, Kelowna BC

2. How Did You Hear About You Are Collective?
I found you guys through the mental health community! You always supported me and my posts throughout it all.

3. What’s Something You Love About Yourself?
I love that I am kind hearted and able to connect with all kinds of people.

It will creep up on me without warning and send my thoughts elsewhere without control. One thought turns into two, two turns into four and so on... Where I find myself trying to retrace my original thought or I am stuck spiraling into the worst outcome my mind travels to.

I wanted it to stop, I remember holding my head telling myself over and over

I wanted the pain to go away, I don't want to feel like this anymore. 

All I remember is my eyes fading into a bright white light and that was it.

Bell Canada took a big leap forward with mental health when they introduced their foundation Bell Let's Talk in September 2010 and #BellLetsTalk day in 2011. The idea that a simple retweet, text, or view of a video could make a greater impact than people ever imagined. 

I clearly hadn't done my research and just believed the propaganda around the fictitious holiday, #BlueMonday. I mean, all sorts of places were handing out free things to lighten the mood on the dreaded day where supposedly #mentalhealth and #mentalillness crises were at an all-time high. I was sold!